Make It, Break It, Repeat
Value #5: Creativity
The Story
In 2018, I was interviewed by Laura Vanderkam and Sarah Hart Unger for their podcast, Best of Both Worlds. Their topic is women balancing work and family life with passion and pragmatism. It was a new podcast at the time, which was how a relative nobody like me got to be interviewed; they’ve since interviewed notables like Gretchen Rubin, Anne Bogel and others.
In the interview, I was asked to explain how a full-time teacher managed the practicalities of work and childcare with two young kids at home. (At the time, my oldest was five and my youngest just over a year. WOW where has the time gone.) It was a fairly typical interview, but there was one thing I said that stood out to Laura and Sarah, something neither of them seemed to have considered before:
I come from a long line of deeply creative people; I’ve written before about my grandmother’s intensive creative periods— painting, sewing, mixed-media collage, writing. My grandmother’s two children— my mother and uncle— are both passionate about books and music. My uncle is an author, musician, and musical producer; my mother taught reading and writing for over thirty years and now is a certified musical therapist and performer on harp, which she began learning after retirement.
My sister and I are the same— both writers, both musicians. In our family, it’s music and writing, all the way down. Creativity is not just a value; it’s my perspective on the world.
Creativity is my divinity.
So when I said to Sarah and Laura, “Parenting is a creative act,” I really meant, “Everything is a creative act.”
Creativity unlocks joy and potential in a world full of challenges. It allows us to make new things, but also fixes things that are broken.
Unless— and this is a big unless— you’re feeling broken, yourself.
You may have noticed that I didn’t post anything last week despite promising a continuation of the VALUES series. That’s because I’ve been going through what I’m calling, a bit tongue-in-cheek, my “Mid-Winter Depresh.” (I picture the dude-bro character Brad in How I Met Your Mother, played by Joe Manganiello, saying this in my head. It keeps things light.)
There are so many reasons for this “depresh.” It’s mid-winter. It’s dark and I’m disconnected from sunshine. It’s cold and I’m disconnected from nature. My thyroid medication is out of balance. Everything our government is doing is too fast and too destructive and I can’t do anything to change it— and neither, apparently, can my chosen political party. I could go on and on, but you get the picture.
So. Last week I had to wallow a bit. I felt a little bit broken. It seemed that as my worldview suffered, so did my creative powers; I was unmotivated to write much of anything, even my journal.
Basically, I felt like Rainbow Brite without her color belt.
Instead of keeping my regular schedule, I slept later in the mornings. I didn’t do anything nonessential, prioritizing my teaching job and caring for my family. I ate what felt good to eat. I walked, but didn’t force myself into any intense workouts. I connected to nature. I limited news podcasts.
And I realized something.
During times like these, I’ve figured out what I need to do through trial and error. Feeling my way through. Deconstructing, then reconstructing habits and mindsets.
Getting creative with my mental health.
Creativity doesn’t disappear during the down times. Instead, it gets redirected and refocused to help the creator find her way.
That’s how things work: you make them, you break them. Then you make them again. It’s a beautiful, endless, creative spiral.
Series Update
This was the fifth post in the Good Character VALUES series! Value #1 featured Beaker the Muppet in a conversation about balancing “Me” and “We;” Value #2 recommended attempting time travel as a way to balance past, present and future-thinking; Value #3 encouraged contemplating death in order to get more out of life; and Value #4 bemoaned the decline of kindness, politeness and social norms.
Stuff You Might Like To Know
I’m reading THE GOD OF THE WOODS (literary thriller) by Liz Moore and TANGLED UP IN YOU (romance) by Christina Lauren and both are captivating. I haven’t found my latest Audible listen— any recommendations?
I’m also applauding the debut memoir of my friend and co-editor Casey Mulligan Walsh: THE FULL CATASTROPHE: ALL I EVER WANTED, EVERYTHING I FEARED released last week to great acclaim. I had the honor of reading the book over the summer, and gave it five stars! Here’s part of my Goodreads review: “This is a book of resilience, and how a life marked with struggles forges a character of tenacity and the deep, complex understanding of how grief and joy intertwine.” Buy the book through her website links here.
In shorter-form reading, I found the Sun’s After All This, on school shootings, completely spot-on from my perspective as both parent and teacher. You won’t enjoy reading it, but you should do it anyway. We can’t look away from school violence.
In lighter news, I’m listening to more music! My biggest problem with Apple Music is that adding to my personal playlists from a seemingly infinite array of music is overwhelming. So I decided that every week I’d focus on three or four artists or styles. This week it’s Meghan Trainor (pop); Felix Mendelssohn (classical); Chicago, the movie musical (showtunes); and bluegrass.
Keep hoping. Keep caring. Keep trying.